The Introduction

In Uganda, when a man wants to “wed” a woman, there is a very formal process. In Uganda, there is a difference between being married (a less official, kind of common-law situation, usually because people don’t have money for all that goes into a wedding and introduction) and being wedded, which is the typical US idea of marriage. The first part of getting wedded is the introduction. This is a huge party and huge charade of acts to try to work out the logistics of the marriage. It includes the groom needing to be able to pick out the bride (from a hilarious selection of first very young girls, then slightly older, finally a group that includes the bride dressed very fancy). Then the girl is sent back into the house and the negotiation begins. Each side has a negotiator and they discuss the bride price. This is mostly how many cows for the girl. Our friends that we sat near said that they have seen every extreme of this. Sometimes the family is so happy for their daughter, they say they don’t want anything. Other times, the groom is willing to pay anything. And sometimes a decision can’t be reached, so there is no wedding. Our negotiations started at 18 cows, I think, but ended in 4 being paid. Plus, there were crates of beer and soda, which were brought in different waves, which added to the suspense. There were interesting jokes, like if the beer crates were missing any, the brides family would say they were being cheated by the man. If they were all full, they would say the man must have no friends to come all this way and not meet anyone to share a drink with. After all the formalities, there was great entertainment, including a man dressed as a woman and doing traditional women dancing. And there was food. It was a great time, so check out the videos and pictures. This couple will probably be getting married in the spring.